CFLF Blog

Keep Rolling

Scott on left with snowboard, his friend Bryan on the right wearing skis

(Read the text below, or scroll down to watch the video...)

My name is Scott Buchanan. I’m 35 and I have Cystic Fibrosis. Its been over 11 years since my last hospitalization.

The Beauty of Silence

After finishing college I had been anxious to throw myself into working, and if I couldn’t find a “real” job, I needed to go back to school soon. I was restless to prove myself to the world, believing my validity laid with a title, position, or a master’s. As 2017 carried on, my mental health dwindled and my pursuit of “validity” was failing.

A Dryer Setting

So often when I’ve spoken about becoming “normal,” I’ve gotten several responses that all say the same thing: Normal is just a setting on the dryer. It doesn’t exist.

From a human perspective, this seems like a legitimate claim. There is no one way to get something accomplished. The majority of the time, there is no right or wrong – just a difference of opinion. We are all so diverse and that should be celebrated.

A Cyclical Life

In many ways life can be boiled down to finite series of cycles. Whether it’s drawn-out like how long the earth takes to revolve around the sun or something shorter such as how many days until you need to do laundry again, there are always positives and negatives to every cycle. For people with chronic illnesses, beginning to think in cycles can be a useful, though unfortunate, way of dealing with what you are going through.

The Beauty in The Suffering

Suffering is a key component to life with Cystic Fibrosis. There is no need to dwell on this, it simply is a fact. Living with a chronic disease is painful. Every single day is different, and the pains and aches come and go like the wind. It’s easy to become lost in a world of despair when it seems that life is too painful. But if you look at it from another perspective the suffering is magnificent. Without the suffering it would be easy to miss the truly spectacular moments in the mundane. The pain we experience shows us why it’s so important to hold gratitude for the good days.

The Emotional Nitty Gritty of CF Exacerbation

Everyone knows a cystic fibrosis exacerbation will knock you out physically, but it’s the emotional experience that can prove to be all consuming.

For me, it inevitably starts with denial. So what if I’m a little extra tired? What parent of a four year old isn’t tired? That’s weird I got out of breath reading a book to my daughter. My cough sounds bad but it’s probably just allergies.

Laughing at the Sky

I recently read a book that moved me in so many ways. It was one of those rare ones that hooked me on page one and held me throughout. Part of the reason was the quote that was included at the onset and reinforced throughout:

“When you realize how perfect everything is, you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky.”

College and Career: Making it work with Cystic Fibrosis

Being a college graduate with Cystic Fibrosis (CF) and diabetes truly is one of my proudest accomplishments. I know the opportunity isn’t always a given and despite yearly hospitalizations and a very ugly attendance record, I somehow still managed to graduate within four years.

My 2018 Anti Resolutions (Part 1 of 6)

Clock In Snow

Each year, the turn of the calendar brings the cultural practice of creating “New Year’s Resolutions” in striving to improve our self, our lives, our health, or our finances with some level of commitment in which we are the judge of pass or fail. This practice is not something I really subscribe to. My life in both surviving and thriving with cystic fibrosis (CF) has entailed a willingness to go against the grain in not being limited or defined by perceptions or expectations of science, statistics, or cultural belief about me or my CF.

The Heart(h) of Christmas

I don’t want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don’t care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is YOU

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